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In my nearly 20 year relationship with my wife, I can tell you the two things that have been most important in us staying together and having a happy, healthy relationship:  compromise and communication.  It is insanely important to know that, once you are in a partnership with another person, your wants/needs/desires must still be met but not at the expense of the other person.

Compromise is key to everyone in the relationship getting a fair stake in life.  One person can not always get what they want at the expense of the other person getting nothing they want.  Compromise is a way that both parties come away with something that they want or need, therefore making both parties happy in the end.  There are times when it seems like compromise will not work, but, if you look deep enough, there is almost always room for compromise.

Communication, and I can not stress this enough, is so important in any relationship.  You must be willing to say what you mean and be 100% honest with the other person, even if you know you are going to hurt them.  Healing from an argument, creating change in the relationship, keeping the relationship exciting and fun, can not be done without honest communication.  You must not be afraid of any topics and must talk daily, even if only to discuss the grocery list or what happened at work.  Talking daily to your significant other creates intimacy on a mental level, and this intimacy leads to closeness on all levels within the relationship.

If you are in a relationship or considering one, please know that without communication and compromise, it is destined to fail.  In order for any relationship to work, both parties’ needs must be met and their feelings heard and respected.

Relationships with a partner are hard! That is a given fact in today’s society. The increase of divorce or separation has become an overwhelming statistic. It seems as if the prevailing attitude toward any relationship is a "throw away" attitude. I have heard many say even before a marriage or the beginning of a relationship "Well if it doesn’t work out there’s always divorce" or "if it doesn’t work out I can always leave". This leaves one with the attitude that no one cares about staying together.

One of the main keys to any relationship is the trait of mutual trust and respect. If you don’t respect or trust your partner, there will not be a atmosphere of peace in the home. The first step in picking a domestic partner is to find someone who has similar interest in life. You will not be happy if your partner is always going off to meetings or to groups which you do not like. This is not to say that you can’t have some differences. It would be a boring household indeed if there was not some different aspects of life. Going to have coffee with the girls or going to the game occasionally with the guys is a natural thing to do. But, if you do not trust that when your partner is out of your sight they will still be faithful, there is no reason to even consider a long term relationship. You also have to respect each other. You have to respect each other’s need for privacy sometimes and also respect each other’s need to have some alone time occasionally.

Relationships do take work and patience. My first marriage ended in divorce. Fortunately, it was a collaborative divorce, but it was a divorce nonetheless. My wife and I have been together (happily) for 28 years. We have had our differences, but we have talked like adults and worked things out. We have been together through three parents death, bankruptcy, difficulties and problems with children and even one child’s death. Our relationship is stronger now than it ever was because these incidents brought us closer because we worked together to get through them instead of shutting each other out.

Now I’m not saying we’re perfect, because no one is. But we accept each other’s quirks as something to look over or love each other for rather than to draw us apart. So to sum up, love each other, trust each other, respect each other, and try to act like adults when problems come up. Best of luck and pick your partner based not only on the outside but more importantly based on what’s on the inside.

Many wonder how to keep their relationship going. It is easy and exciting to start one. It is sad yet still simple to end one. But the in between? Well that part is hard work. There are some who are exceptionally turned off by the feeling that a relationship may be work. Unfortunately it is, but you should just take a step back and reevaluate your relationship. Most will find that anything worth doing requires a little bit of elbow grease. This brings me to the first step to making your relationship work: commitment. You have to commit to your partner. Talk to your partner and share in this commitment to each other. Tell each other and yourself that you will spend an agreed amount of time as a team.

The second step is communication. You and your partner need to talk. Most complaints about a failing relationship begin with “we just don’t talk anymore.” In the beginning of a relationship the dialogue is fresh and stimulating, but as you continue in time conversation can seem repetitive. Find interesting news articles or pieces and share them with each other. Sometimes it just takes a tiny push to be creative and ask each other about their day or what they think. You’ll be surprised at the results. Some of the most deep and touching moments can stem from an effort to communicate.

The third and last step to a successful relationship is generosity. Be generous to each other. Take your partner out to the movies and pay for their tickets and snacks. Take the time to make them a hand-crafted gift. Be generous enough to let go of an argument or a grudge. Try to see your partner’s side in certain disagreements. Just find the balance between staying true to yourself and being the better considerate version of yourself.

Follow these three steps and be open to the possibilities. Commitment, communication and generosity will work wonders. Just take them in consideration everyday. In fact, you these steps will lead to a wonderful relationship with anyone. Good luck!

3. Honest with others. Now this is what should follow if we have come clean with ourselves and come clean with God, and it does to an extent. But sometimes even at our best we are still tempted not to be honest with our fellow man. It is not always the easiest thing to do. Fear is the great enemy that creeps in and tries to rob us of our integrity in our relationships, fear of what others might think or do if we are truthful with them. If we allow this fear to keep us from being honest, then our relationships will never be what they ought to be. Our relationships will never be the deep, beneficial, intimate relationships that could truly enrich our lives and bring honor to our Maker.

2. Honest with God. A person has to come to a place where that they are honest with God. You might as well be honest with Him, for there is no way that you are going to pull the wool over His eyes. Now I don’t believe anybody in their right mind would deliberately lie to God but I believe that it is possible to do it in a willful sub-conscious way if that makes any sense. But if we take the first step of practicing honesty with ourselves than honesty with God will come much easier.

Honest with ourselves. Honesty begins with me, I have to be honest about myself, about who I am, what I am, how I act, how I feel and how am I relating to God and to my fellow man. That can be painful at times but it is a pain that can bring healing into our lives. If I will come clean with myself about all my personal issues as well as public issues than I can begin to move forward if I so desire. Just being presented with the truth in itself is not enough, I must act in accordance with the revealed truth for it to benefit me.

Relationships, the crux of our life’s are comprised of relationships. Yet sometimes it is the one thing that we neglect or fail to give our most urgent attention to. The truth of the matter is that we as people were created to live in community with other people, we were meant by our Creator to have (I believe) good relationships with our fellow human beings with whom we share this planet. If you study the teachings of Christ Jesus you will find that He taught extensively about relationships. He spoke of our relationship with God and our relationships with each other. He knew that life was not made up of material things or the trapping of this world that alludes to our selfish nature, but that life was made up of relationships.

In speaking about relationships I think it should be pointed out, what exactly makes for a good relationship? There are numerous things I could point out and I am sure that there are many varied opinions on what makes for good relationships, but I like to speak briefly about what very well could be the most important part of any healthy thriving relationship. That thing I believe to be most important is honesty. Simple, yet such a powerful concept when coupled with love.

Honesty, the word rolls so smoothly off our lips doesn’t it. Most of us consider ourselves no doubt as honest people don’t we? But are we really honest? Are we honest with ourselves? Are we honest with God? Were we honest when we have an initial consultation with a divorce lawyer in Austin? Are we truly honest with others? These are questions that we should ask ourselves and strive to answer honestly. Let us break down the process into steps so we can embrace this concept in a way that will benefit ourselves and also the people in our lives.